I have identified four fundamentals that will make or break your relationship. These four relationship keys provide the foundation for relationships to thrive and maintain a sense of romance, connection, balance, and longevity.
Key #1: Date Night!
I challenge all couples, no matter what stage of life they are in, to commit to a five-hour date night each week. This means getting babysitters for some and staying active as a couple for others. Many couples in crisis do a quick “dinner and movie” every now and again, but is that really a date?
The purpose of a date night is to get to know each other. Even after thirty-eight years of marriage, you still have things to learn about one another. This is a call to action for all couples to begin planning a five-hour date night each week and treating this special occasion as a priority.
If you need ideas for what to do for five hours, email me, and I’ll send you what I give to my clients (matt@ascendcw.com).
Key #2: Couples Council!
I believe every couple needs to have a weekly staff meeting. This is a live meeting, not one managed through texts or a quick phone call. This meeting is specifically for managing the issues all couples face in being a couple, raising children, and living in a fast-paced, busy world.
This meeting is meant to create connection, solve problems, and plan strategies. All couples councils begin with prayer and a moment to share gratitude for each other. Couples then resolve or manage conflicts they have encountered, discuss parenting, plan vacations, and schedule the upcoming week.
This meeting is a two-hour strategy session for keeping the passion alive and strengthening the relationship.
Key #3: Family Home Evening!
In April 1915, the faith I belong to began teaching families to counsel together in what was termed Family Home Evening. I think the leadership of my faith foresaw a day when we would all become so busy that we neglected the family system.
The family system is the purest—and still the best—form of government on earth. If families are strong, neighborhoods are strong. If neighborhoods are strong, nations remain strong.
Keeping your family strengthened requires counseling together for the good of the family. This meeting gives children a voice in creating family experiences, and it gives parents time to teach growth, responsibility, and accountability to the children over whom they have stewardship.
Never skip this weekly stay-home-and-be-with-family night.
Key #4: Spiritual Devotional!
Couples who want to lead the spiritual growth of a family must first build their own spiritual connection. Couples prayer is a time set aside morning and evening to kneel together and discuss their needs with their Heavenly Father.
This habit is one of the most humbling, romantic, and connecting activities a couple can do together. Couples in crisis often begin skipping prayer. I challenge couples to never skip praying together for the good of their marital connection and to strengthen their relationship with Deity.
My challenge to every couple is to check your relationship for
these four relationship keys. Are all four of these keys habits regularly practiced? If not, begin making a plan to implement all four as prescribed.
I promise you will notice an immediate difference in the romance, connection, and spiritual nature of your most cherished relationship.
Relationships & Connection
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Matt lives in St. George, Utah, where he and his wife, Chris, are enjoying their life with each other. Since their children have grown up and moved out to pursue their dreams, Matt and Chris travel the world. They want to visit 200 countries before they are done. Matt and Chris are active in their community and enjoy working out, training for marathons, and spending time participating in numerous activities with their adult children.
Matt received a PhD in psychology. He is focused on the arena of resolving personal conflicts and improving interpersonal relationships. In addition to his doctorate degree, Matt has earned a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy, studied criminal justice and received a category one license with Peace Officer Standards and Training, and received a degree in the Arts of Business Management. Matt is a professor at Dixie State University and hopes to be part of the positive growth of Southern Utah.